Bullfights are hugely popular because you can sit comfortably with a hot dog and possibly watch a man die. It won't be me, but I can sit comfortably and watch it.
-- Albert Brooks

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Even if you didn't see the movie, you'd see two words you'd never seen put together before - comedy and Muslim. Comedy is friendly - it's the least offensive word in our language.
-- Albert Brooks

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I come from the place where I am thinking 'I have put my blood on the pages.'
-- Albert Brooks

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I was in Kashmir last weekend. Went to visit one of my sweaters.
-- Albert Brooks

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I'd still like to see 'Survivor' minus the planned show-biz parts. That would be the purest form of show business - I want to see someone so hungry that they eat somebody else's foot.
-- Albert Brooks

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I'm not interesting enough on my own that you'd want to see a film about me.
-- Albert Brooks

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If we had 3 million exhibitionists and only one voyeur, nobody could make any money.
-- Albert Brooks

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It's better to be known by six people for something you're proud of than by 60 million for something you're not.
-- Albert Brooks

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When I die, if the word 'thong' appears in the first or second sentence of my obituary, I've screwed up.
-- Albert Brooks

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